Haven Alumni Highlight - Samantha

It is hard for me to describe what all The Haven has done for me, not because I can't find the words, mostly because I don't have endless time. So, I will attempt to bullet point.

Prior to me coming to The Haven I was hopelessly addicted to Opiates and Methamphetamines. I had 14 different bookings into Salt Lake County jail, and 1 in Utah County jail (the time I thought that a geographic change was the solution to my problems, and the time I realized I am the problem). All prior methods had failed me, I had interventions, scare tactics, boundaries given, tough love, lots of love, moving, Incarceration, Probation was reporting me as hopeless and that they wouldn't take me back, everyone around me wrote me off as hopeless and I honestly agreed. I remember walking into The Haven like it was yesterday, doing my intake in front of the group on my 28th Birthday (yes, my Birthday!) I remember everyone saying, "What a wonderful Birthday gift to give yourself" and I couldn't be more furious, I truly thought this was going to be another waste of time and couldn't wait to get everyone off my back so I could go back to the only thing I cared about. I wondered my first week " how long can I BS before I can leave?". Then I remember the Speaker meeting, the very first time I felt the unity and hope everyone else had in their eyes. It was a much older gentleman, he had a different story, a different substance of choice, a different upbringing, different everything, but for the first time I felt like someone felt the exact same way as I did. That person had years of sobriety somehow. I knew I could do it, I knew if I had a fraction of the light this Gentleman had, then I just might make it out alive. From that point I hit the ground running. I paid attention to everyone who had a day or more of sobriety than I had, participated in groups, tried not to break any rules, but mostly listened to the People who weren't doing this deal perfectly, they were very imperfect people and I listened to how they stayed sober through all their defects and imperfections and IT WORKED!

I have done a lot of rad stuff since going through The Haven. I have met a group of Women who have made me who I am today, and I must say I absolutely love who I am today, that is a far cry from the shattered woman who walked into The Haven with a broken needle in the neck. I have been able to work for multiple treatment centers. I have been able to work in Detox Centers and Treatment Centers, just see where people were at and remove as many obstacles as humanly possible so that they could possibly find a sliver of what I had found. I remember thinking to everyone " If there is air in their lungs, there is a chance". Then I received some earth-shattering news at the young age of 32, I had Stage 2 breast cancer and had to receive Chemotherapy, Radiation, and a Double Mastectomy. I had an entire community of Recovery that rallied around me. I was honestly afraid that I wouldn't be able to stay sober through this, but I knew I had to. That is a far cry from the girl who would use over stubbing her toe. But I did it, I really did it. I know that I wouldn't be here for multiple reasons without The Haven, like my outcome at best would've been an overdose, and at worst it would've been the slow death of cancer. I do know one thing without a shadow of doubt, I am who I am and where I am because The Haven and the haven leadership showed me how. #worksifyouworkit