• Residential Treatment

    Residential Treatment

    With access to an alcohol and drug-free living environment - successful recovery is possible.
    Individuals trying to abstain are more successful in a residential treatment setting.
    With access to an alcohol and drug-free living environment - successful recovery is possible. Individuals trying to abstain are more successful in a residential treatment setting.

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  • Activities for Fun

    Activities for Fun

    A common misconception between addicts is that "My life will be over when I quit!"
    The Haven opens possibilities by teaching individuals how to have fun sober.
    A common misconception between addicts is that "My life will be over when I quit!"
    The Haven opens possibilities by teaching individuals how to have fun sober.
  • Build Healthy Relationships

    Build Healthy Relationships

    A key component to long term sobriety is healthy relationships.
    The Haven facilitates building relationships based on boundaries and helping others who are in need.
    A key component to long term sobriety is healthy relationships.
    The Haven facilitates building relationships based on boundaries and helping others who are in need.
  • Lake Powell

    Lake Powell

    Each year The Haven takes Alumni, Residents and others in the community to
    Lake Powell all of whom share a common goal to stay sober.
    Each year The Haven takes Alumni, Residents and others in the community to
    Lake Powell all of whom share a common goal to stay sober.

Get Your Life Back

The Haven offers both residential treatment and sober living programs for men and women struggling with addiction to drugs and alcohol. All of The Haven's facilities are conveniently located near downtown Salt Lake City, within walking distance of UTA TRAX and the University of Utah. Individuals needing help to stay sober find extra support with The Haven's Sober Living Program. While residents work on the skills needed to live alcohol and drug-free, The Haven Alumni show residents that life without drugs and alcohol can be fun and exciting. The Haven has been has been a leader in treating substance misuse disorders in Utah since 1969. Recovery from alcohol and substance abuse is possible.

Parents Of Adult Addicts - 7 Suggestions For Coping

Parents Of Adult Addicts - 7 Suggestions For CopingIf you are the mother or father of an adult child who is not making the choices that are necessary for a sound future, this can be a heavier burden than any of the earlier ones you carried. When your child was young and misbehaved, you probably knew how to discipline your child.

Whether the effect was lasting or not, you probably felt that at least you were “doing something.”

Before a child is born, most parents are already carrying a heavy burden. They recognize that a great deal of responsibility comes with bringing a child into this world and typically believe that every choice they make from the moment of conception onwards is going to play a role in how their child turns out.

For the most part, they may be right. Some choices made during pregnancy can definitely influence a child’s physiology and future health. Consuming alcohol, using drugs and some medications, eating nutritiously, among others, can all influence the health of an unborn child. However, as of the moment of conception, some unique personality characteristics and physiological potentials are already pretty much fixed, regardless of pre- and post-birth parenting choices that are made.

As an adult, your child is no longer legally your responsibility, but you may actually feel an even heavier burden of social and emotional responsibility for him or her. Depending on how far from your personal measure of “good” your child falls, your personal level of anger and shame may vary. Some parents resort to hot anger and recriminations of “I didn’t raise you to be like this!” Other parents fall into a trap of accepting the blame that some misbehaving adult children want to place on them. Some parents may be bled dry by meeting the financial assistance pleas/demands from children who are habitually showing up in the judicial system and need money for court/legal fees. (And they may hope, often in vain, that the money goes to the stated purpose rather than buying their child more trouble). Some parents carry great shame about their children’s mistakes – believing that if they had just done a better job somewhere along the line, this problem/behavior would not have appeared in their child’s life.

We all make mistakes as parents. Yes, it is true, even good parents are not perfect parents. All of us could do a better job, in some way, than we do. But once a child is grown, you cannot have a re-do or an undo. It is equally important to remember that once a child is an adult, they have all the power they need in their lives to make smart decisions. And as a corollary, adult children have no right, whatsoever, to blame their parents for decisions they are making today. A wonderful perk of adulthood is that adults get to take responsibility for themselves and make their own decisions.

7 Coping Skills:

1. Love your child. But remember that loving your child does not mean enabling your child. It means holding him accountable for his behavior and refusing to allow him the power to dismantle the family.

2. Do not assume that you can “rescue” your adult child . . . that is simply not possible and attempts to do so are definitely not the way to encourage autonomy and responsibility for any adult.

3. Protect yourself and the rest of your family. Not every adult child has to hit “rock bottom” before turning around her life, so do not allow your child to bring you or the family to “rock bottom,” either! No longer is "rock bottom" seen as a necessary starting point for changing an addict's life; your family does not need to hit "rock bottom" before getting stronger, either.

4. Love yourself. Parents truly do the best they can, but should not hold themselves accountable for the poor choices of their adult children. Once you become a parent, that role has no end point. However, the responsibilities of that role definitely shift over time as a child matures. They lessen, not expand. Loving yourself and accepting your limits will keep you from spiraling down as a result of your child's choices.

5. Remind your child that it was their choices, not yours, that placed them in the circumstances that currently surround them. Emphasize that it is their conscious decisions, not just “happenstance” or “bad luck” that led them to this place. Interventions can be effective when you let your child know that their bad behavior affects everyone in the family and in his or her social and professional constellations, as well. One of the most important aspects of an intervention is that it is one of the family's steps towards health -- it is a sign that a family is moving into the recovery process.

6. Offer assistance and support only to the degree that you are financially able and that will move your child towards a better life. Don’t give money that you know will take them further down the road of bad behavior. Some people suggest that parental funding be tied to a child’s good faith efforts to improve their situation. However, if you feel guilty for not giving your child money for food, because you are fearful it would only be spent for illegal drugs, buy her a bag of groceries instead of giving her cash.

7. Offer to help your child find support services, but don’t blame yourself if they refuse to use them. You cannot help someone who does not want to help themselves. Honestly, you cannot, as much as you would like to be able to do so. It simply does not work that way.

Accepted Insurance Plans

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galaxy
cigna
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Give Now!

The Haven is a 501(c)3 non-profit orgnization which means your donation is TAX deductable. Corporate sponsorships are available for select events and levels at certain times of the year. Please give the gift of sobriety to an individual struggling to leave the life of addiction.
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Connect With Us

PHONE: 801-533-0070
FAX: 801-596-2240
EMAIL: info@havenhelps.com
ADDRESS: 974 E. South Temple
Salt Lake City, UT 84102 [map]


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Sponsors

George S. And Dolores Dore Eccles Foundation Marriner S. Eccles Foundation The Lawrence T. Dee – Janet T. Dee Foundation R. Harold Burton Foundation Katherine W. and Ezekiel R. Dumke, Jr. Foundation United Way Sorenson Legacy Foundation
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